After hearing news that I so wish I could change for loved ones I can’t help but be incredibly thankful for the much needed night in with our kids, daughter in law, and grandkids and absorbing all of their laughter.
While helping my dad update his new phone with birthdates I discovered I have 40 days until my 40th birthday. While some freak out over this milestone I’m oddly okay with entering this new decade of my life. How lucky am I to have such a loving & always building me up husband, four healthy & beautiful children and daughter in law, the two most adorable grandchildren in the world, the four most supportive parents & in-laws, two always at on my heels old pups, amazing family, and the best friends a lady could ask for. Honestly, life is precious and I’m for one incredibly thankful for mine.
Had four generations in our home tonight for dinner. Doesn’t get much better than that. Thankful for the precious memories our family is able to build.
A day filled with 19 people, family, friends, children, grandchildren, four soldiers that became friends, thankfulness, two turkeys, countless sides, a multitude of pies, nerf wars, a broken trampoline, scooter races, Turkey hands, and lots of laughter. It was a perfect day!
Also, when you over hear one of the soldier say “this is the weirdest Thanksgiving ever!” you somehow know they had fun too and will likely never forget your family either.
The huge gift my husband gave me this morning was turning my alarm off to quietly bringing our girls to school and allowing me the chance to sleep in. Waking up to find beautiful roses, a card that made me cry, my coffee (good God does he love me), and a few other goodies was just a bonus. I’m thankful to have a man that doesn’t just choose one day in February to shower me with love. He shows me daily in so many ways that may sometimes seem unnoticed, but never is. He truly is my partner in all aspects of life. He seldom misses a beat. He shows our children daily what true love between a husband and wife really is and how a man should always treat his other half. That’s the best gift he could possibly give me.
Today I get to go to a preschool class party and two 2nd grade class parties (my friend had to go out of town and her little lady wasn’t happy about that, so I’ll be dropping by to visit my little Lala too!). This evening instead of a date night Daddy will have dinner at home with all of his girls. I’m going to make them chicken hibachi and tofu (for the ones that like it) and for dessert I’ll make them their heart shaped cookie cake and chocolate covered strawberries they look forward to every year. What better way to spend Valentine’s day than with the ones we love most?
It’s funny how a picture that most probably would have over looked, or just took a quick glance at, while going through old pictures can tug at my heart so much. I’m not even sure it’s one I remembered. Yet this is the picture that got me the most this evening after our girls went to bed and I finally allowed myself the moment to really think about my Maw-Maw. Today marked nineteen years since she passed. Nineteen years since I’ve had one of her hugs, heard her voice, gotten advice from her, listened to one of her stories, or just witnessed the most beautiful smile in the world. It doesn’t feel like nineteen years when I think of her. It feels like it just happened. It was by far one of the most difficult times of my life and something I still struggle with if I’m being honest with myself.
This picture is probably circa 1980 or 1981. I was probably 2 or 3. I wish her face wasn’t cut off in the picture, yet the second I saw it I know it’s my Maw-Maw. The way she’s standing. The way she’s always right by my side. The second thing I noticed about it is that I’m sitting in “the highchair”. The highchair all three of her children sat in. All of four of her grandchildren sat in. And even all four of my children, her great grandchildren have sat in. The high chair that remains in our dining room to date. Then there are little things that would really likely go unnoticed. Like the breadbox in the background. That thing was a staple item in my Maw-Maw’s kitchen. I always loved it. Many years ago I walked in Matt’s Aunt’s house and was so excited to see the very same bread box in her home. She gave it to me that day. To this day it’s on top of our cabinets in our kitchen and makes me far happier than I’m sure his Aunt will ever know. I also see the kitchen table my Paw-Paw made. I see the oven that I can still hear the sound it made when it opened and even remember the smell of her homemade biscuits she’d bake. And I’m almost positive that’s my cousin Lil Joe standing there. I smile when I see just how much our youngest daughter favors me. A simple photo that brings me so much happiness and yet still tugs at my heart strings. I really miss this beautiful soul. I’m really thankful God let me have her for as long as he did. And I’m really thankful for all of the specially memories that I will forever cherish. I’m even thankful that something as simple as watching Bitty dance around last night to Garth Brooks makes me know how much she would have loved our three little girls. And how much of a blessing it was that she was around long enough to love on Budah for nineteen months before she passed.
Today one of my best friends posted this picture on my facebook with a birthday message.
It’s from her last visit here a few months ago while playing cards against humanity. A lot of laughter took place that night, A LOT! I swear I’ve come back to look at this picture several times through out today (as well as many other great ones that have been shared). It has made me smile every single time. This is a really good reminder for me for those days that I have been rough on myself about things that are out of my control, of how truly happy my life really is, through the ups & downs, how very thankful I am for the people that are in my life! I’m grateful for each and every one of you that find ways to bring this kind of laughter to my life.
I’m looking forward to what 39 brings. I’ve been working so hard on myself over the last few years. Both physically and mentally. I’m finding a new found strength in myself and I really do love it. I think on my way to 40 I’m going to push myself so much harder as I get to know myself better. I have a tendency of putting myself on the back burner in all aspects of my life. My husband constantly encourages me to do otherwise, but it’s just my nature. I’m slowly finding a balance I didn’t know I was capable of. I’m making time for myself, really need a ton of work in this department. I’m reading more, exercising daily, trying new things, testing my limits, learning when to say no, and when to walk the fuck away. I am so full of love, so full of ideas, and so want to always keep everyone happy and now I’m learning how to add myself to that list of people I intent to keep happy. Thankfully I’ve got an incredibly supportive husband that always has my back, truly phenomenal friends, and family that never ceases to amaze me. 39 is going to be fantastic!
I’m thankful for the last…
- 8 years
- 96 months
- 416 weeks
- 2,920 days
- 70,080 hours
- 4,204,800 minutes
- 252,288,000 seconds
…that I’ve been able to call you my husband.
Every single moment has been a blessing or some form of a lesson that we’ve been able to share hand in hand. We’ve lived in two states, four towns, and five homes. Raised four children. You’ve graduated from college. I’ve been able to cheer you on as your career has and continues to grow. Including our side businesses we’ve owned. We had a beautiful home built from the ground up for our little family. We’ve had our first child grow up and move out. You’ve comforted me in ways you’ll never know during that big life change (we have a few years left to be sure the girls stop growing up). You manage to live in a house full of gals and don’t hesitate to paint nails or braid hair. We’ve been our lil monsters biggest fans while watching them in school, soccer, choir, band, cheerleading, a first job, various hobbies, skateboarding, tap, ballet, & jazz. We’ve both had serious health scares. We’ve said a few goodbyes. We’ve gained new family members and friends. We’ve traveled to other countries and states with our kiddos. We’ve experienced a few Daddy & Mama getaways. We’ve taught our children and somehow manage to learn more from them than we can ever imagine teaching them. Somehow as different as our personalities are we seldom seem to clash. And when we manage to piss each other off we know it’s never above us to say I’m sorry to one another. Seriously thankful that’s not very often (the fighting, not the appologies). You’re happy to have me be a housewife, yet treat me as your equal. You never hesitate to help me cook or clean. We love our moments home with our family just as much as we value our time alone. You always have our family’s best interest in mind. Always put us first and always defend us. You support my wacky ideas. I swear sometimes you must read my mind. We share some of the most comical inside jokes and moments. You make me laugh like no other. You also make me feel loved like no other. You are so much more than my hubster & father of my lil monsters. You are easily one of my absolute favorite people in the world! You sir hold the key to my heart. Can’t wait to see what this next year brings with you by my side.
Happy 8th anniversary love!?